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"ok YOU try having a fictional relationship with someone after they'd fictionally used you for marzipanning trepanning while they wore fictional upset toddlers as legs, and not be bitter"
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  NYOWZ! - Simon Weston: The Game announced

In a hastily prepared press conference this afternoon, Falklands War veteran Simon Weston attacked Whitney Houston for stealing his thunder. It was revealed that Mr Weston had also been converting his autobiography into a game for Nintendo’s Wii. Deep in development already, the game is due out early 2010.

Early levels are a simple battleship simulator to kill Argentine navy personnel, before the ship you control catches on fire following an air raid. Subsequent levels consist of beating the Wii mote and nunchuck attachment against your face to extinguish flames. All before the final level which finds you bashing “A” to heal and “B” to be brave.

Fifty percent of the proceeds will go directly to the Royal British Legion and The Healing Foundation.

We are sure the game will be a hit. Just like that bomb.
 
    
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